We all wear this sign: The Hidden Impact of Everyday Interactions
When I was in my mid-thirties, sitting in a doctor’s waiting room with one of my kids, I stumbled across a children’s book called I Am Loveable and Capable by Sidney B. Simon. The whimsical illustrations caught my eye, but it was the story of Randy and his invisible sign that stayed with me.
Randy, a fourteen-year-old boy, begins each day wearing an invisible sign with the acronym “IALAC” – I Am Loveable and Capable. It represents his belief in himself and the warmth he expects from the world. But as Randy navigates his day, small interactions chip away at that sign. His sister snaps at him over breakfast, a teacher criticizes him in front of the class, classmates tease him during lunch. By the end of the day, Randy’s IALAC sign is in tatters. The story illustrates how seemingly minor slights can accumulate, leaving someone feeling unworthy and incapable.
Years later, while researching for paper on Emotional Labor, it struck me that Randy’s story mirrors the experiences of adults as well. Let’s consider Charlie, for example—a contact center associate starting their Monday with optimism and a fully intact IALAC. But the day quickly takes its toll: a frustrated customer’s parting words, a glitch that balloons their call handle time, and critical feedback from a manager. Each interaction tears a piece of Charlie’s sign.
Unlike Randy, Charlie experiences a few moments of repair. A coworker praises their handling of a system error, and a senior leader publicly recognizes their effort in a difficult situation. These moments, small as they are, act like tape holding the torn pieces of Charlie’s sign together. By the end of the day, Charlie feels worn out but not defeated.
Both Randy’s and Charlie’s stories highlight a universal truth: we all carry an invisible sign that reflects how we see ourselves. Every interaction—positive or negative—has the power to either tear it apart or help mend it.
Simon’s allegory is a powerful reminder of the impact our words and actions have on others. Casual remarks, teasing, or criticism might seem insignificant in the moment, but they can leave lasting marks. Conversely, small acts of kindness, recognition, or empathy can go a long way in repairing someone’s sense of self-worth.
As we go about our days, it’s worth imagining the invisible signs that others are carrying. We can’t always see how many tears their signs have endured—how many small slights have worn them down. But what we can do is choose to be the tape that helps mend those signs. A kind word, a gesture of encouragement, or even a smile can make a difference. By treating others with care, we create a world where everyone’s IALAC can stay a little more intact. Let’s be intentional about lifting others up—because we all wear invisible signs, and we all have the power to help repair them.
Love yourself and elevate others.
EB
